Ten centuries ago (internet time), I reviewed The Mother of All Meltdowns, an anthology about the point at which normally rational, loving, and sane mothers cracked under kid-induced pressure.  Now, the women who created that book have launched a website called No Mother Is Perfect because… oh c’mon, you’re smart.

In honor of that launch, I’ve been given the chance to interview two authors from the book about whatever I want!  I indulge in parenting horror stories frequently but today, I’ve asked these two moms to tell me about the more shiny (but still real) moments of motherhood.  Thank you Kristi (Finding Ninee) and Jen (My Skewed View) for participating.

Name one way you are a great parent.

Jen:  This is a trick question, right? I’m good at not throttling my child and husband.  I’m good at knowing when to walk away.  I’m good at smelling smoke so fast the house hasn’t burned down yet.  I’m good at recognizing when it’s been quiet for too long.

Kristi:  I’m mostly pretty good about realizing that from my son’s perspective, there is magic in watching ants crawl on tree bark.  When he wants to look, I try to be patient and let him, rather than hurrying him to the car.  It sounds small, but I’ve found when I can take a deep breath, and do that, that I’m more relaxed in parenting in general.

What have you brought with you from your pre-parent days that helps you be a better parent?

Kristi:  My husband!  Seriously, him letting me sleep in on Saturdays helps me to be a better parent.  Oh and not being a clean-freak.  I brought that, too, and it helps. A lot.

Jen:  My parents raised me to be extremely polite, and I always have been.  I wasn’t sure, but have recently been told that I have the most polite child by many a stranger and friend.  No one is more surprise than I am, pleasantly surprised of course.  I think his manners might automatically shut off when he walks in our house.

How do you cultivate joy in your home?

Jen:  I think, for us, joy is part of everyday because we spend all our days together.  I am not being facetious either.  I homeschool Isaiah 4 days a week and my husband works from home.  We know each other so well that we know how to make each other happy.  Sometimes we are dancing around the house, sometimes we are drawing pictures and telling silly stories about them and other times we are sitting and playing a favorite video game.  Sometimes I lament that I am always in the same room as Isaiah, with barely a minute to myself, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.  Although, I will admit we (and when I say we I mean Isaiah) definitely know how to set each other off too!

Kristi:  Play.  Patience.  Laughter.  Evening wine.

Heard any good kid jokes lately?

Kristi:  A bear and a rabbit were pooping in the woods.  The bear turned to the rabbit and said “Hey does poop ever stick to your fur?” The rabbit looked at the bear with disgust, and said “Uh no.”  So the bear wiped his butt with the rabbit.

Pig 1:  Boy I never sausage heat!

Pig 2:  I know!  I’m just bacon!!

Jen:  There was a bear and another bear.  And the bear was on top of the mountain.  And the bear said “Why don’t you get off the mountain?” and the other bear said “Because it’s the Grizzly Mountain!”  (that was spontaneous and ended with much laughter) (he also added the reason I didn’t laugh was because it is hard for Americans to understand)

Didn’t you love that?  Now  please click away immediately to either buy the anthology or to explore the No Mother Is Perfect website.  Do not, do not, do not forget to enter their humongo giveaway.  No, seriously, like gigantic.

Want to know more about those sponsors?  Click below:

The Oaks at Ojai
Cariloha
Wicker Central
Metropolis Coffee Company
Wind & Fire Jewelry
Chuao Chocolatier
Global Rose
Anew Riesling

A little note about Anew Riesling…  I am not a Riesling person.  I’m a malbec or “Oooh I’ve never been to New Zealand so I’ll drink wine from there” kind of person.  That is to say, I know nothing about wine.  HOWEVER, I can recommend from personal experience that Anew Riesling goes fabulous with Netflix and some take-out Chinese.